Relationship confidence actually starts with you. It is about how much you care about yourself, your sense of value, worthiness and what your personal preferences are when it comes to your personal relationships.
Relationships are a Mirror.
Relationships are actually the place where we can learn so much about ourselves. Every relationship acts like a mirror, highlighting our wounded parts or the parts of ourselves we need to heal. They also the mirror the parts of us that we love and enjoy!
When we are in a relationship and interact with our partner, we can learn so much about ourselves. When we learn to accept that relationships are a mirror of ourselves, we can embrace personal growth. It also means taking responsibility for our own ‘ stuff’ – no more blaming our partner for our unhappiness or holding anyone else responsible for the way we feel.
Try these tips to build up your Relationship Confidence.
- Believe in your own value. If you don’t value yourself, why expect your partner to value you?
- Be true to your own personal preferences. Time spent away from your partner is healthy. Don’t give up on all your own interests just because you are in a relationship.
- Don’t move too quickly. Talking about marriage with your new partner after a few weeks is a red flag! Take the time to get to know someone and make sure they are right for you. Don’t settle for second best. If you are dong this, you are treating yourself as second best.
- Speak up in your relationship. You can’t blame your partner for not doing something if you haven’t spoken to them. Remember, your partner doesn’t have a crystal ball nor are they a mind reader. Honour yourself and speak up if you have something to say. Don’t suppress your own needs.
- If you are in a relationship that makes you feel unhappy, get honest with yourself and honour your own emotions. Do you need to have a courageous and assertive conversation? Do you need to remove yourself from the relationship? Always remember it is good self care to look after your own feelings and needs regardless if you are single or in a relationship.
- Never accept constant criticism or negative behaviour from your partner – nor constant criticism of yourself in your own mind for that matter!
- Don’t make your partner responsible for your happiness. It is not their job to make you happy – it is your job! If you are constantly waiting for your partner to make you happy, this may be sign of co-dependence and can quickly lead to feelings of resentment and blame.
- Commit to sorting out your own inner wounds. When you do this, your relationship mirror will change you will attract the partner who is perfect for you.
Sydney Life Coaching
Sydney Life Coach and Confidence Coach Lisa Phillips is the author of ‘The Confidence Coach‘. In this book, the Australian Life Coach shares her tips on building confidence is all areas of your life including in your career, relationships, public speaking and body image confidence. Lisa also shares her work regularly in the media.
With over 19 years experience, the award winning Sydney Life Coach works with people all over the world assisting them to feel good and let go of negative emotions. To find out more about her work, please see www.amazingcoaching.com.au